So, writing today, after class. I hope Juan recovers. He was such a good sport, and what we did to him publicly, well. . . if you are not used to it, it can smart. But it's good medicine. We all need it. And I hope that we all see the benefit of doing this collectively.

Well, I really hope I don't turn to this blog as an excuse for not writing. Today I have not touched, and am not going to. It is late; I just got back from a required social event, and to touch -- when my mind is utter mush-- would simply be going though the motions. What I can do, perhaps, is say a few words about the next steps, the "to-do" list that I need to work on.

So, I think I need to read Zinn's Revolution chapter again. The reading has gone stale. I need to read it fresh, just like I read the WWII chapter fresh. I found myself saying, after Monday's rather fruitless hour and a half, "why am i doing this?" I think second guessing myself is a waste of time. I am writing this paper because I have something to say. What exactly it will be I see only in broad contour. Oddly, I know the argument, as it an argument I've been working out for at least two years. What I don't have is the rigor, the thoroughness, the details and sense of utter immersion that makes me honest. I am too old to do dishonest scholarship. If I can't go the whole way, I don't want to do it. So the issue really is patience and faith. Oh my goodness, the F word. I don't see the way out right now; but have faith that if I do this with devotion, something useful will come about. Wow. I didn't expect that!